Sorry for not replying. Lots of pent-up anger that needs channeling at the moment. And the wind is nuts outside.

My priorities are so mixed up;; with the tidepool light comps due on Thursday and Metr quiz Friday and Paris stuff to worry about. I wonder why I didn't utilize my spring break better.

For Fanime's contest, which is due this Friday. Not gonna make it ;__; SOB.
Their mascots as RPG characters.
Speaking of Fanime, last week I received an email from AA staff. So hellmaster05 and I have a table!!...somewhere. We don't know where it's located until the con.

Sorry for the lack of posts lately. I guess the best way to say it, as my instructor would have put it, I had a "large rat to digest." Had a lot to think about, and suddenly they're all just bamming together. Classes/projects, trying to keep up my drawing mileage, down to 6-10 weeks of the semester, work, the Paris trip stuff need to be wrapped up, Fanime's approaching, searching for an apartment for next semester... To bring the mood down more, it also doesn't help that some of my favorite Japanese fansites are disappearing one by one when they were kinda my stress relief eyecandies T_T; And after getting in the program, I started reflecting on myself, trying to realize my own drawing weaknesses, which I found a lot of. I keep thinking I wish I had found these weaknesses sooner instead of now, wish I was as motivated and skilled as my peers. It's just a lot to take in and come in terms with.

Ah, two Paris meetings ago, my professor had us all say out loud our guilty pleasures to everyone as an exercise to be honest with ourselves. And.....I actually said to everyone, "Homoerotic stories/pictures are fascinating." There. My advisor now knows this side of me. W-which means permission from him on expressing it through art 8D;; But needless to say, everyone had some really odd ones, and there's a very strange trend of guys having peculiar hygiene guilty pleasures XD;;;; It was VERY interesting... This will definitely be a fun group of people. On the same note, because we have 9 free days in Paris after the class is over, some of us are thinking about traveling to Ireland~

I wanna draw アイリン！！（＊´д｀＊） OH OH. And also Lord Ike costume!!

Happy New Year's Eve!! ^^
あけましておめでとう！新年快樂！
AHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh and eternalsayonara I received your card! >o< Thank you so much!

Obligatory 2008 reflection. I consider 2008 an extremely pivotal year for me.

• I got my first part-time job during March, though I never expected to be working in the Engineering building at all. XD I'm definitely not wanting to quit any time soon. Fast internet, access to color printer and office supplies, awesome faculties, working with Photoshop and Illustrator, decent pay. Can't ask for better first part-time.
• Finally did Artist Alley at Fanime for the first time with hellmaster05 , and along with kyraensui , mingmingcheong , and shahni , created one of the most memorable Fanime experiences yet.
• My sister m00_chan graduated and entered college. OHEMJEE.
• Went to Europe (STILL haven't posted a summary yet...) in the summer and got treated by a doctor in Paris for my sorethroat infection
• Witnessed China's manpower and lived through one of the most epic Olympics in history.
• Got through a hellish semester alive with decent grades (though I'm still fighting for the 100W one!) and got into the Animation/Illustration program! Also got to know fellow peers a lot better.
• Got a Wii after 7 years of no new consoles \^o^/!! Finished Twilight Princess after 7-8 months, SSBB still owns my life, and I suck rock in Rock Band 8D!

Let's doublecheck with the resolutions I posted for 2008 in the beginning of the year. XD;
☑ = accomplished. ☓ = FAIL.

☐ Be more active on Livejournal, deviantArt, MSN.
☐ Reconnect with On/Offline Friends
☓ Do some more webdesigning and coding
☑ Keep up grades. Be informed of program entrance info. Get a job.
☐ Be better at talking out problems. Be more sure of and honest with myself.
☑ Interact with family more.

So... the blank ones, they've been attempted, but not accomplished. I feel terrible for losing connection with so many people, LJ, dA, and MSN alike. I totally didn't touch webdesign at all this year. There were many times where I wanted to rant but I was either too lazy or too worn out. For the family one, well, comparing to last year, I definitely appreciate family gatherings more now. Last year I complained the lack of unity in the family. I think... it got slightly better this year. Overall, I think I've trained myself to try looking more positively about everything around me.

Not really doing anything special for the New Year ^^;; Feel an artist block coming though.

First of all, welcome back everyone who went to AX! Hope it was fun!

On Friday, hung out with kyraensui, mingmingcheong, and hellmaster05! Tho in the end we didn't watch movie, we played Rock Band Wii at my house. Played all day yesterday too. It was teh awesome. 8D Butchering the vocals is my forte.

Uhm, bought the cosplay magazine Layers, because...



( Haruka4 - Kazahaya's costume!! )

Also bought the Zelda Four Swords+ mangas at an impulse. xD The four five Links are so fun, what with their different personalities... I love Red and Blue's little fights, but Shadow Link's development was the highlight. I need to get OoT vol.1 in Japanese... the one we have is the Chinese version, and I can't find it anywhere else, so I wanna keep it in fair condition.

Let's see, I finished looking over the Geography midterm stuff. I actually enjoy the material for the class a lot. It reminds me one of my earliest passions in elementary school was earth science (somewhat geography then). I remember borrowing so many books about rocks and minerals from the library ^^; Well that is until high school where my academics in science rock bottomed (no pun intended). Actually there wasn't anything in particular I excelled on.

My classes for Fall is still not completely figured out yet, but I'm just keep avoiding it. This won't do... *losing sight*

Man, I just don't want to think anymore. Thinking takes too much energy.
But yay I'm angry, tired, and screwed all in one.
Now to memorize 40+ body muscles by tonight.

So today's interview went pretty well. Apparently the Engineering Dean's office was looking for a student with some graphic design skills for a while now, but no one applied for the position. I pretty much got the spot :D! Starting already next Wednesday. Approximately 10 hours each week, starting wage is $10.00, which isn't bad at all for part-time. Though my first paycheck is gonna go to my mom, reimbursing the 3 units that I dropped (in which they STILL didn't drop yet *curses*).

I mean, of course the leisure/art supply money is a big part of it, but the larger picture is that... I just wanna have a chance to prove I can do something right on my own. Provided that I can neither sing or cook or write quality paper or have good grammar or draw as well as others. It sucks feeling so, well, I guess handicapped or pampered, reinforced, being helped by parents all the time. Not that I'm ungrateful, but I already feel like I'm behind everyone else in experience, so there's the need to build up and catch up.

Kira and I are going to sketch together at Santana Row. Whee :D! We realized we have the same taste in terms of aesthetics... only she's much better at capturing them xD;

Minor note is... dude, I'm investing too much energy at ciassu_vitello DAMMIT. Lalalalalala. ♬

Taken from vejiicakes:

→ News expressed by Ellen; CNN video news: Lawrence King, a 15 year old boy was shot and killed by a fellow 8th grader because Lawrence had asked him to be his valentine.

That's so messed up...

So where do I begin? This weekend was my sulking weekend due to multiple reasons, so I gave myself silent treatment. I rather that than exploding it to/on someone.

And then suddenly, Mom offered me to contact one of her co-workers in Sun's media/design department for internship opportunity. Somehow we wounded the interview day to be tomorrow X_X;? And just this morning, someone from the College of Engineering Dean's office called me. Apparently Jenny sent my resume to there since they were seeking a student assistant for their web developer. The interview is Friday 3PM. o_o; ( Comments. )

On the same note, today a Korean concept artist from Blue Sky Studios came to give a presentation. His stuff were so good TAT;;; He worked for movies like POTC, Men in Black, Star Wars, etc.

My roommates and I were discussing about next year's rooming, and it was all about finding a new roommate for me since my roomie won't be housing next year. My roomie introduced me to her friend who's a Graphic Design and Japanese major. Two of my other current roommates will also be in the same roof. I hope next year will work out.

SPEAKING OF MY ROOMIE, SHE BOUGHT ALL 3 SEASONS OF HOUSE ! *marathons with* 8D
"Candy canes? Are you mocking me?!"

Now steering COMPLETELY off-tangent, happy happy for ciassu_vitello, because Reborn/Lambo DESERVES a place of its own >u< ! ♥ 終于有地方跟RL同學們萌~~ I want time investment on fanworks. I WANTS T-T Dude, it's only 3 months away from Fanime, and I intended to try artist table... BUT ARGH time for prep work PLZ T_T I just feel like I'm thrown around like a ball this semester.

khr攻受 is great amusement. O-okay. Study for Asian Americans midterm tomorrow.

Yesterday: Sketched at the mall 9AM to 2PM as a class. Then 3PM to 7PM, sketched at the science building with a few peers.

Today: Sketched at the mall with Sal and Kira from 9:30AM to 5:30PM. Okay, maybe half of the time we were looking for good landmarks and/or socializing/eating.

I'M THINK I'M TIRED.

I feel bad for not going home this weekend, especially since my dad's birthday is tomorrow... But you know, this is what I need for motivation - sketching and traveling with friends, watching them. Hate to say this, but... honestly, home just doesn't provide that.

( Comments on this semester's 112A & B students & peers. )

So uhm, back to the mall. AHHHH. Peak moment is... there was this Chinese 8yr old boy who came by while I was sketching, and then he said "You must be a professional!" AHHHHH little kids have the purest comments ever T_T I complimented him for taking art classes every Saturday. Then, sitting next to me, he asked if I could draw this booth that was selling Valentine's Day chocolate. As I was sketching for him, he asked if I knew Charlie and Chocolate Factory; then somehow it went to Avatar XDD He said his favorite character was Prince Zuko, and I went "Me too!" Then he asked about Zuko's scar, about the fire nation, and the element benders... and it was just AHHHH TOO CUTE ♥ His parents came to pick him up around 10-15 minutes after. But GAHHHH. This makes me want to be an elementary art teacher XD; So... CUTE CUTE CUTE.

Now... Reborn ep.69. DUDE. How did they change Lambo from the manga to THIS OUTFIT (is he wearing undie at all..?)? It spells outrageously ghey and... samba (pineapple's fault?). 蠢牛越來越笨啦~~ =口= 一定是里包恩幫他選的 xD;......... and the worst part is that I'm MOE-ing?! I mean, why not? Totally ghey, but I still bought the fanservice. (口水) I miss the random appearances of the dumb cow~ Does that mean yukata!Lambo will be in the next Shou-chan episode *_*? 萌え~~

Okay, agenda for tomorrow:
- get Carb-Othello pencils tomorrow.
- get silhouette assignment done
- practice Maya
- start on comic?

I still haven't caught up my reading...

One of those artistically unmotivated days. They bring my mood down more than anything else, and I hate it.

Going to my physician tomorrow and will ask about my neck pain (which as been about a week) and throat x_x; It feels muscle related.

I want to be a little kid again... thought high school was a pain, but if I had the chance, I'd repeat it make better use of it, seek the guidance that I evaded yet needed, and perhaps admit I was lost.

Got nostalgic over last year's break making the Tenma costume, now wondering how I even made it at all. And then looking back at the artbook, I went nostalgic over Apocripha/0 and that period of mass fanart production. How did I do it T_T

HAPPY NEW YEAR, everyone!

I haven't properly thank you for the Holiday cards ^^;; Thank you so much rady, holidayblue, dgm_allenwalker, kawachu, miyukiko, kimi_kuma & saramichiru, lichanny, misss_vampire ♥!!

New Year 2007 meme stolen from enjoyelsilence:

( What did you do in 2007... )

( Self reflection )

Well, I go watch Kouhaku and then Labyrinth :D

Oh yah. 'twas a tard and stayed up until 4:30 yesterday doing Reborn pchat with many others~~ I did the adult Lambo and then Bel for the first two rounds, respectively. Got too tired for the remainings. God I am so bad at pchat T-T; Everyone is so talented~~

Oh yes, just came back from Uncle Wallace's memorial at a Chapel in Hayward.

( The Memorial )

Having two deaths within less than a month (July has been jinxed) is not good my tear glands. *sigh* x_x

My sis wants to go play arcades, so I better get ready now. Still, death makes everything else seem infinitely less important.

For English, we are reading the book In Cold Blood, a nonfiction documentation of a real murder case that happened, and surprisingly enough I like the book. Yesterday I read until my eyes grew weary ≡_≡ And then our assignment is to write a fanfic ghost chapter based on what we read (due Weds.). Problem is finding a gap to work off of. Maybe I will write about Perry's messed up life :X

Anyhow, one part particularly interested me. ( As much as I didn't want to, I cut the scan and commentary anyways because I understand English bores a lot of people. Though, it is interesting stuff. ▼ ▼ )

.....OKAY. And must stop feeling so deeply from just lines of words. *stabs self*

Anyhow, I finally updated my art site after months of silence. And a quick update for P-D.net (I swear, it really needs a new look.) That's it. Must pay more attention to my sites... I think I'll claim full possession of P-D.net now since my sis seems to have fully neglected it anyways. :|

Also, ethe@dA is my new coloring/illust god(dess) ♥_♥ It is scary to read that she lives local in San Jose. And... seeing how dedicated and ambitious mushroomtale and kitmun and everyone else is, I really have to try a lot harder in improving ><; Class input is just not enough. Must clear this damn to-do list. And... I will soon return to foruming.

I guess ending on an amusing note, two nights ago I dreamed about treasure hunting, flying, and out of nowhere I met Miyata and two other seiyuu (wasn't sure who they are, but one of them could have been ItouKen) o_0;; I dreamed something else last night too... though I forgot what it was.

Sleep.

Just came back from showering and watching my aunt's Chinese dance performance. Since I haven't watched her dance for so long, and I have free time, and since I haven't seen them for a while, I decided to support her. I was quite amazed at all the dancers, especially the little kids! They all danced with such grace and coodination that it made me want to be a kid again.

I admire my aunt's dedication on dancing. Even though she isn't pursuing it professionally, she was a dancer before, and she doesn't want to lose touch. I take it that many of the kids there will also be long-term dancers too, even if it's a leisure. Sarah (high school classmate) dedicates herself to ballet with such passion. It just made me think... I don't really have any long-term dedications at all. *facepalms*

In pre-school, I quit gymnastics. In 2nd grade, I tried piano for 2 months, then quit also. In 5th grade, I was dragged into playiing oboe for some reason for 2 months, quit as well because I am SO not made for blowing instruments. In 8th grade, I tried a bit of Chinese dancing and didn't continue any further. (Shhh, yeah yeah, pathetic +_+) The only thing that I can SORT of say long-term is that I played the Gu Zheng for around 5 years now... but alas, I can barely dedicate myself to it now either.

I admire those who have stuck with some kind of performing arts or community for a long while, because I don't really have such. It's not something they should regret, honestly. Some time later in the future, you learn to appreciate it, just like you learn to appreciate pictures of you when you were little kids. I'm talking like a middle-age already. "Sigh, those youngsters";;;;;

Anyways, I'm getting all depressed from this X_X *stops* Look on the bright side, they said I got thinner, and I'll be fabric shopping tomorrow 8D *is shot* Still gotta fix the damn MySQL errors. Received 2 mails bout broken fanlistings already X_X Teh bastards.

Happy Birthday seki_yumizu, and early one to kitmun-jie~~!
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Hope you all have a wonderful bday *_* Sorry for the sparkle spam.

Woke up with an upset stomach, which sucks = =+ Still hurts. It sucks because it's so hard to say why the stomach's aching.

But, Aw. Aw. Awww. 青龍配果然是王道 ♥（欲同人）

I promise I will order Haruka Matsuri 2006 by this week. Also all Xmas cards will be printed out by this weekend. CG is 80% done. Will start the commission this week.

;_; Have 36-line poem due tomorrow. That's a lot of lines. orz..... Yesterday registering for Spring 2007 took 5 hours = =+ BUT YES. I CAN PASS ART12 by retroactive adding the course to this semester *_*v

Note to self: Finals in TWO WEEKS. Start studying.

♥ Footer until 12/1: Those who missed it, I'll be mailing out Xmas cards. LJ Friends Only. See this for more info. ♥

Raining. Well, I can't believe Thanksgiving holiday just ended like that. 3 more weeks until semester break. MUST BE PATIENT. ♥ I actually read 1 Anth. chapter, got 4/6 story critiques and both Neil Gaiman reports done. T_T;;

( Personal cut. LOL. Daddy. Forums. Spring semester. BLAH :D )

On other notes, I'm a terrible fangirl, and *gasp* did not order Haruka Matsuri 2006 DVD yet because of budget and I was also contemplating between it and Crossover II Live DVD... (My mom doesn't really approve me purchasing anything $30+... AND... I'm quite conservative in purchase and fandoms, for someone who doesn't have income = =|||) but AFTER SEEING the previews kmarcello provided, I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. 小関小関小関小関小関小関小関小関小関. ♥ ♥ ♥ And so.... my bargain: I buy Haruka Matsuri (along with Sato Anna's CD, I WANT), and she said she'll ask aunties to chip in for Crossover II DVD >3< !!!

I JUST REALIZING MY SCHOOL SEEMED TO HAVE BLOCKED BAIDU.COM OR SOMETHING ;_;

I promise I will sleep early tonight. PS: I also got my first commission. $9, not too bad. ♥

♥ Footer until 12/1: Those who missed it, I'll be mailing out Xmas cards. LJ Friends Only. See this for more info. ♥

...I have to do a better job at setting the right alarm when taking naps. First, two weeks ago, I was late 45 minutes to Art History for setting the alarm an hour late. Then today I was late 20 minutes for setting it at the right time numerically, but A.M. instead of P.M. ||| If I didn't wake up, I would've slept the whole way.

But... *SQUEEEE* Shimatani's new single PASIO will look like this!

It seems like she really is segmenting out of her Crossover style now.

Speaking of Crossover... her Crossover II DVD tracklist [DVD releasing on December]: http://post.avexnet.or.jp/shimatani_s/ KyaaaaAAaaaaaa!! The tracklist is GOLDEN. She even sang Heart & Symphony tracks that were missed out on her Premium Live 2005! ♥_♥ Eep, I don't need more things added onto my want-to-buy list....BUUUUUT. Mona Lisa. Salvia. Camellia. *whines* She is the only Jpop singer I truely spend on.

But Yahoo Japan gave a sneakpeak on the live, for whoever that's interested:

→ → → http://www.sendspace.com/file/8rc9ae

I worry. I remember telling myself not to spend money on leisure, but this year has been the most out-of-control. Wonder if it has anything to do with the psychological effect of being 18. Ya know.. "I'm an adult! I can buy whatever now!" But at the same time, I want to support the artists I love.

Happy Birthday to me
It's my tanjoubi
Happy Birthday to Sachi
Now I can buy yaoi

~ written by yours truly®

Thank you kaitou370 for the beautiful icon for prezzie~ It looks so precious ♥___♥!!
Unsterblich Liebe in der Tat ^^ Thank you soo much *smooooooch*!

I'm 18 now. (pss, actually, I was born at 5:25PM :P)

No longer a minor. That gives me many advantages. XD That includes eBay, Paypal, definitely yaoiCon, and stuff. Though, there will always be this tiny person inside that will never grow up.

Thank you queenofbatpig for the nice chat today~ It has been a while ne ^^ Jumping from different fandoms to another. From Haruka to Meine Liebe, from NANA to Furuba, and Gungrave! Oh I sooooooooooooo anticipate in watching it *___*!

Today was Senior breakfast, and so friends hung out in their own groups. My group combined two tables and had our own little party. ( cut for details )

My mom delivered flowers - carnations - and balloons to the school to me. I was a little embarrassed, but touched. ^^; Thank you mom. I love carnations.

As for the downside..... ( Cut. College rant. )

Birthdays are always this anti-climatic eh?

OH GOD IT'S FEBRUARY.

Yup. Lack sleep because I keep doing stuff like this. Bad timings... never underestimate the power of lacking sleep... Not if you add instead of subtract in math, and you write "husband" for "hundred" on your paper. (I'm serious, I did that today @_@)

Anyways, stolen from misss_vampire because my muse tells me to do so. *drum rooooollls* :D

1. Taken a picture?
*points to her default icon* DOI.

2. Taken a shower with someone?
When I was little, all the time. I wanna be a brat like that again...

3. Made out with a member of the same sex?
Uh, to what extent...?

4. Drove a car?
Yep. For 2 years now.

5. Stolen anything?
Yep. Little thief.

6. Like someone?
Always from a distance.

7. Been dumped?
Well, they're mutual break-offs, so I'd say no.

8. Stole money from a friend?
No.

9. Gotten in a car with people you just met?
No. Unless I wanna be sliced to pieces.

10. Been in a fist fight?
I knocked Olivia to the floor before... it's her fault for pissing me off!

( Questions #11 to #100 )

Oh God, that took 30 minutes. I should have been drawing. *baka*